Percy Fucking Jackson
by someidiotcalledfuckyou
Summary: A fucking romance
1. Chapter 1

Percy had an enormous penis, which his gf liked a lot, but Percy was not a happy camper because his gf didn't have a penis which made him sad because he liked it up the butt. Luckily for him, she had an enormous strap on penis which she put in his bum and he liked it a lot, but swore her to secrecy because he was ashamed of his secret homoerotic feelings that he occasionally harboured. Actually, he only ever had homoerotic feelings he just didn't want to be judged and he made his gf strap down her boobs because omg ew he only likes dick lets just get that bit straight okay (that's the only time you can mention straight about Percy I'm serious over here omg)

Meanwhile, Leo and Jason were in a close vicinity and Piper was there doing not much of anything idk why she was there come to think of it but the point was that she was present, and she casually mentioned the enormity of Jason's penis. Who knows who she was talking to, she doesn't have any friends stupid Piper omg. Jason wasn't listening and neither was Leo but then his ears perked up and he was all "What, penis, what?"  
"Jason has an enormous penis," Piper said extremely casually which was a bit stupid because everyone knows how proud Leo is of his penis, God she's stupid wtf.  
"My penis is more enormous than his," said Leo indignantly.  
"What, penis, what?" Jason said after missing the first two mentions of penis.  
"MY PENIS IS ENORMOUSER THAN YOURS!" Leo cried with a fiery passion.  
"Excuse you, bitch, put your penis where my mouth is, lol, I mean prove it my penis is enormous," Jason said arrogantly.  
"I would love to put my penis where your mouth is but for now I will just show you it's rlly awesome you might need some sunglasses to protect your eyes from all the beauty" he said and then hot damn he whipped that thing out and it was huge like 10 inches or whatever the ideal penis length in fan fictions is.  
Jason also whipped his penis out and they were all "woah" because what do you know the penises were the EXACT SAME SIZE.  
"Well, what the fuck are we supposed to do now?"  
"Penis fight,"  
And so they both held their floppy penises in there hands a smacked each other with them. Who knows how they expected to accomplish anything, but it was very exciting to watch. Piper took off all her clothes and started masturbating because of all the penis but nobody cares about Piper, seriously, fuck that bitch.  
Their penis started getting hard and actually hurting each other, so they stopped that and Leo's penis went into Jason's conveniently pre-lubed butthole and started moving around which made both penises very happy and soon they were spurting cum everyone.  
Piper finished masturbating and started crying because now she didn't have a bf boo fucking hoo.  
After they had some gay sex they were ready for even more but they decided to go into a cabin and do it there, because Piper's crying was totally putting them off.  
They entered some random cabin and gasped because Percy's gf was currently fucking him in the bum with a large strap on.


	2. Chapter 2

"Oh my god Percy wtf why didn't you tell me about your homoerotic tendencies we could have been making sweet, sweet buttsex together!" Leo said loudly with a faint hint of melancholy tainting his otherwise totally calm tone.  
"Yeah, dude, you always tell us about your homicidal tendencies this is way more fun than those omg," Jason said pissily.  
"I'm sorry, guys," Percy sobbed, Annabeth's strap on penis still shoved up his bum because she was too busy staring in awe at the two penises that had just entered the room I mean be honest who can blame her hot damn. "I just never knew how to tell her that I don't like vagina"  
"Well, I think we've found the perfect way to break it to her," Leo said fondly  
"Aww, yiss," said Jason, swinging his penis excitedly.  
Percy wiped away his tears and shoved Annabeth to the ground because vaginas do not belong in the circle of penis love I'm sorry Annabeth it's the way it's gotta be. So she left, strap on penis blowing forlornly in the wind, all her hopes and dreams crushed. But whatevs. Life's a bitch. Deal.  
Anyhoo, Annabeth left and left the three guys with their impressive penises together. They kissed each other, and wooo so hot yum tongue and Leo put his penis in Percy's mouth while Jason put his penis in Percy's bum so all in all all the penises were happy except for Percy who's penis was sticking up like a lonely palm tree on a desert island. It would be sad except for Percy was super stoked by all the penis so he didn't care that much.  
At that moment in time, a dwarf walked into the cabin without knocking, and upon seeing all the glorious penis love going on he immediately ripped off his clothes, eyes searching for a lonely penis not currently occupied. He of course saw Percy's penis sticking up all on it's lonesome. The hairy dwarf hopped on that missile like it was a penis. Which it was to us, but remember, dwarves are small so they have itty bitty buttholes so it really was a missile to the random dwarf. But he was a slutty dwarf who randomly went into humans cabins so he was pretty much used to it by now which was gr9  
So yeh everyone had really happy penises even the dwarf who managed to somehow be riding Percy's dick and sucking himself off at the same time because dwarves are fucking magical bitches woot woot and so all the happy penises were spurting cum into various places it was beautiful. And then Leo and Jason left because they had enough sex they needed some rest okay give them a break. And then Percy realised that there was a dwarf on his penis and screamed and ran away. He remembered his clothes, though, because that Percy was a smart cookie, yes indeed, he knows that you cannot just go running around screaming without your clothes, good on you, Percy. This is why people read about him. He passed Piper crying on the ground but who even cares about her, fuck that bitch.


	3. Chapter 3

So Percy was running around screaming with his clothes on just for the sake of decency when he bumped into his best bro Tyson!  
"Sup, bro?" asked Tyson politely  
"Oh, not much, sup with you, brah?"  
"J chilling with my one eye"  
"Oh, yeah, speaking of eyes, Jason and Leo probably want to see ur second eye if you know what I mean,"  
" If you are using crude innuendo to talk about my penis, then yes, I do know what you mean! How do you know they want mah penis, tho?"  
"Lol, I didn't tell you?" Percy laughed at his forgetfulness. "I just had this crazy threesome with them I still have some of Jason's happy penis fluid up my bum."  
A single tear rolled down Tyson's cheek. "Percy, I love you! I thought you only liked vagina so I didn't peruse it, but I may as well tell you now. I want my penis to be the only penis you ever have up the butt. Please say yes and let Leo and Jason just fuck each other."  
"Tyson! I never knew! Of course I say yes!"  
"Sweet. Now, would you like me to show you my second eye?" Tyson asked, winking seductively.  
Percy blushed, and Tyson took that as a yes so he whipped his thang out and Percy was so aroused that all his clothes fell off and then they both started fucking it was beautiful. Tyson's penis was in Percy's butthole, and his hand was on Percy's penis.  
The penises were both super duper happy but Percy didn't want it to be over so soon. So he took out Tyson's penis and turned him around and put his penis in Tyson's bum making Tyson moan with happiness. And also he put his hand on Tyson's penis and Tyson's penis was just SO happy at that so he closed his one eye and out of the other came his happy penis fluid. He waited for Percy to orgasm in his bum though bc he was just really polite good on you Tyson. Yeah, so out came cum from Percy's penis it was awesome.  
Except for stupid Annabeth chose that moment to wander over to them, strap on penis still swinging forlornly.


End file.
